Follow this five-step plan and you, too can “win” a one-year stay on Hawaii with “free room and board.”

First, Pick an island, any island that normally welcomes tourists.

Second, book a flight to and a hotel room on that island.

Third, take the flight.

Fourth, check into the hotel and go to your room.

Fifth, and the most important step: Ignore the mandatory 14-day quarantine, leave your room, get arrested, get fined, go to jail (without passing “Go” and collecting $200) for an entire year.

If you think I’m joking, read on.

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